Can't post pictures!!!!!

My files are too big for this! And my hubby and I tried to make them smaller files but for some reason now it's not working! Hate this technical stuff. Let me know if you have suggestions! I 'd also like to be able to attach links and other blogs of friends adopting from vietnam but that isn't working either!

why the wait to travel once you have a referral?

I came across this written by a lady on one of the yahoo groups.

I was curious about the exact steps involved in processing a dossier in Vietnam, so I asked my agency for some clarification. I thought this was very helpful in explaining why it takes 4-5 months between dossier submission and travel. Here is the process (according to my agency's Vietnam coordinator):

Basically there are 4 steps.
Your dossier first goes to Hanoi - step1. After it is translated in Hanoi it is submitted to the Department of International Adoption (DIA). They look over your documents and make sure everything is current and that you have all the documents present. Then they send your dossier to the province (where the orphange is) to the justice department.

This is step 2. This is the longest step. During this step, the justice department contacts the orphanage and asks for all the childs paperwork as well. They process the child's paperwork to make sure everything is accurate that the child is really truly free for adoption etc and make sure your paperwork is all in order. When they are finished, they send it back to Hanoi to the DIA

step 3 DIA gives final approval for the child and you and then sends it one more time back to justice department

step 4 The justice department calls our representative to come in and pay the G&R (giving and receiving) fee and our G&R is set for 2 weeks from the date the fee is paid.

Unfortunately, each case can take a different amount of time. We have no idea how long each step is going to take but the 2nd step is the longest. When the paperwork is in the province at the justice department we really get NO update. However, DIA is good about calling us and giving an update about our cases when they get your paperwork back in their office.(end of excerpt)

Adoption language

There is an appropriate way to talk about adoption. We came across the following excerpt that explains appropriate adoption language. We have found this to be helpful in educating ourselves and others.Using accurate adoption language when speaking about adoption is extremely important. Even well meaning family members and friends can inadvertently convey the misconception that adoptive families are less real or permanent, and that a child who was adopted remains somehow different. This can be hurtful and hard to forget by the adoptee or adoptive parents.
Here are some points to remember:
As with race or gender, the fact that a person was adopted should be mentioned only if it's essential to the story. If it's used, relevance should be made clear. A daughter, niece, granddaughter, or cousin who joined the family through adoption is -- and should be described as -- simply a daughter, niece, granddaughter, or cousin, not as an "adopted daughter", etc.

Once an adoption is final, a child is simply a regular member of the family. If it is relevant to mention adoption, past tense phrasing is appropriate, such as "Elia was adopted in August 2006" rather than "She is adopted". Adoption is just one of many events in Elia's life, not an immutable personal trait. Elia's family should be referred to simply as father, mother, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. The man and woman who shared in Elia's conception can be referred to as the birthparents (NOT "real" or "natural" parents). You should never ask, "do you have any of your own?" They are all their own!

The reasons that people adopt are rarely relevant. To suggest or say that someone "couldn't have a baby of their own" is inaccurate. Adoption is a choice, and is not second best. Children who join families through adoption are their parents "own" by law and by love. Families are formed by love, not biology.

Words not only convey facts, they also evoke feelings. The way we talk, and the words we choose, say a lot about what we think and value. When we use positive adoption language, we say that adoption is a way to build a family just as birth is. Both are important, but one is not more important than the other. Please choose positive adoption language instead of the negative talk. People who use incorrect terminology should be politely corrected. When we use positive adoption language, we educate others about adoption.

The Dossier.....

We are almost ready to get it done, notarized, and state authenicated!
What the heck does that mean?
We are currently still waiting to get our marriage lisence back from Hawaii. They had sent it before but the notaries commission expired a few days later. Once we get that we need to start notarizing all of our documents. I'm going to have one notary do them all and then we head to the secretary of state's office to have them certify the notary. We need our marriage certificate, passport copies, I171-H, medical letters for both of us, employement letters/cpa letter, police clearance letters, our homestudy, power of attorney for our agency, and our application for adoption. That's all! And most of them have a 6-month shelf life or they have to be redone. Please pray it all goes smoothly.

Back from the Lake

The kids were great! What a relief! We had an awesome time. AND what was waiting for us in the mail? Our FINGERPRINT appointments! In 2-days!!!!!!!!!!!!
But we were both able to make it with only 3-detours on the drive there. We were a half hour late but luckily they were able to get both of us in. Our state is very fast at getting the approval back (called the I-171a) which is great because once we get it we can fax it to our agency and be officially on the list for a referral of a baby! Yea!
We're almost done!